Becoming a single mum

I was going to write a long deep post about everything that happened, all my feelings and thoughts about it, the details behind it but after sitting here for last 2 hours trying and failing to do so I think i'll just say. My boyfriend cheated, I kicked him out, i cried, screamed, thought about taking my life, ended up on medication and finally moved on with my life. Because in the end those details don't mean anything to me anymore. The whys and the hows of how I got here in this place don't matter. The details that do are that I'm happy, i'm at peace with those feelings and I've moved on.

Today I start blogging again. Using this to write all my thoughts and feelings down, the past feelings they don't matter so why waste time writing about them. Instead I'll concentrate on my future and my plans for that, my plans as a single mother and how I work my way through this new journey. 

Move house

Christmas

Bean xo

A week in Instagram photos ;; June 22nd

Monday : early morning walk

Tuesday ; A day of Disney

Wednesday : Eva's school sports day (bad photo I know)

Thursday ; Afternoon snuggles with this one.

Friday ; A trip into town and a walk in the park

Bean xo

A week instagram photos.

Monday ; A walk by the river

Tuesday ; Lazy day

Wednesday ; "first" hair cut

Thursday ; new book

Friday ; A day of shopping

Bean xo

Candle Favourites.

Olivia Blake London.

Wild Mint and White Tea. 

TK Max

Price : £7.99

RRP : £25

One of my all time favourite candle scents is The White Company's Wild mint candle. I actually planned to get that one on my shopping trip today but £28 wasn't in my budget this week. I cannot tell you how excited I was to come across this candle in TK Max. The Olivia Blake candle is a little more stronger scent wise and the white company is more of a fresh mint scent to it but they are both just as good as the other and smell amazing! Honestly if you have never smelt this candle you really need to. 

Wax Lyrical.

Soft Cotton

Asda Living

Price : £5

It smells like fresh washing which is one my my favourite scents of all time. I love this.

Bean xo

Three counties show.

There is only one reason I go to this show every year and that is the food court and Pimms which for the price of the show (£21 per adult) probably makes me crazy but I do love the show for other reasons to. I love watching the men making horse shoes, (all sweat and muscles what's not to love) the animals of course and the many shows you can watch. Red devils being my favourite. This year I don't know, we got a little bored so didn't really watch any shows which is sad because they are always really good. And due to the amount of crowds we hardly saw any animals either. We did however learn that despite his love for anything car like Archie is not a fan of tractors and hates horses. The photo above showing Eva happily smiling doesn't show Archie who was screaming in his pushchair is sheer terror at this "monster" being near him. (I'm not that evil though, as soon as the photo was taken we moved away from the horses). Over all though we had a great day out and the kids loved it! - I loved getting my cheese, fudge and sausages. (and Pimms of course) 

Bean xo

A week in Instagram photos

Monday

Eva lost her first tooth while at school. She came home very pleased with herself. her two front teeth have been wobbly for ages, infact they took so long to come out that the new teeth have grown behind them! I am a little worried about this as now that tooth has fallen out her teeth are not in the correct place. I am hoping that once the other teeth come out that they will be pushed into the correct place otherwise it's very likely she'll end up with braces when she's older.

Tuesday

 The weather was amazing, so after lunch me and Archie (and my mum's dog) spent the afternoon in the garden, me sunbathing and Archie playing with his cars, chasing the dog and having fun. To keep the sun off him I decided to build him a little tent, the dog used it more then he did!

Wednesday

 My mum had been to the doctors for personal reasons and was in quite some pain, so at 9pm that eveing I walked the 5 minutes to her house just to make her a cup of coffee. That's all I did there, I had a little chat to my brother as well who was on the phone to my mum but I made her a cup of coffee then headed home.

Thursday

 Another sunny day so another afternoon spend in the garden. Archie loves the garden, it's at the moment his most used word. He will ask to go in the garden by pointing at the door and saying "Garden" then brings me his shoes. I love that we now have a huge private garden, it means we can spend hours out here.

Friday

 Thunder storms and rain. Weather wise it was a pretty awful day. I spent the evening at my mums sorting though her cupboard under the stairs and coming across all sorts of treasures from the past. This camera was my mum's when she was a teenager, it first belonged to my Aunt who passed it on to my mum. When I was little this was in my grandads outhouse (along with a gas mask and other "junk") me and my brother used to play with it pretending we were photographers taking photos of models. I am now a huge photography fan and finding this camera made my heart race. It's beautiful, although it's in a sorry state and no longer works, it's such a lovely little camera all the same.

~ You can follow me on Instagram here for more photos ~

 Bean xo

Sister and brother bond

When Archie was a baby I worried alot how Eva would cope going from an only child - used to getting all the attention - to having to share that attention with someone else. I'm not going to lie, she didn't take to being a big sister quickly, although she's always loved him, having him take some of her lime light was hard for her. She had many tantrums and tears, but once he started to walk I think it was a turning point. He became someone she could play and have fun with and she learnt that sometimes it's OK for him to have the attention and for her to stand back and let him.

Now Archie is 20 months and Eva is 6 years old, they have the most adorable bond I have ever seen. Eva has taken the roll of protective big sister and looks after him so much. If he cry's she's there soothing him, she understand's his baby talk and knows what he wants. She is happy to share toys with him and play games together. Sometimes they will sit and play barbies other times they are racing cars, and I love that! While they have completely different personality's - Eva being the bossy one while Archie is laid back and cheeky - and do like different things they are very happy to put their games together and enjoy just playing together.

They share a room now, it's something Eva was really looking forward to and now that it's happened she'd super happy. I'm actually looking forward to the day when they have bunk beds and will wake up and run into my room together all excited. Especially on Christmas morning. I am so proud of Eva and I love her little bond with her brother, I hope they stay close as they grow up.

Bean xo